The dawn of 2012 is just around the corner. What an amazing year it has been! This time last year I would never have dreamed of the adventures I would be on or the changes I would make. It is probably a good thing or I may have got under my warm blankets and stayed there! If I had I would have missed a transforming year!
I know from experience how incredibly hard it is to come face to face with your own demons and look them in the eye. I am talking as much about facing who you are as a person, if not more, than what happens around you.
My personal demons were hard to look at. I did not like who I had become as a person. At times I was judging people based on who I thought they should be or what they should be doing. Each of us filters what we see and hear based on what we have learned. If we all looked at and/or experienced the same situation we would all perceive it differently depending on the filters that we experience it though. My filters had become cloudy.
I had become inpatient with people who were not able or willing to take on their own challenges. Having had to learn to deal with abusive relationships, injuries, and disabilities I fought to overcome the negative impacts. Although I did not always do this well I held myself to a high standard. There is nothing wrong with setting high aspirations for oneself or wishing good outcomes for others. However, I found I had become impatient with those who were not appearing to try to move forward. I had lost my compassion.
Maybe that is why fate provided some harsh experiences for me to cope with. In the process I was forced to clean my filters and see my own humanity when dealing with the ups and downs of life. It was painful but I came through it with renewed patience, empathy, and compassion for others as well as myself.
From this vantage point I dared to tackle changes that were incredibly scary for me and leave the security of a traditional job to venture into private practice. I was really afraid I would fall on my face but luckily it seems to have been an excellent move. I am challenged to be my best me as I work with others with new understanding of their struggles.
A year ago I could not have envisioned the opportunities for growth that this year would bring me. Now as we face a new year I do not know what lays ahead but I am ready to let it unfold with all the joys and challenges that are sure to follow.
To those who have supported me and walked beside me over the last year I sent my profound thanks. May all our adventures over the coming year give us the opportunities to grow as we build a loving, caring community in which we live with respect for our humanity, individuality, and honoring our desire and right to live free of abuse. May this be this be a joyous year for each of you!